12 things New Yorkers are clueless about

12 things New Yorkers are clueless about

11 Nisan 2018 - 02:00

Everyone knows New York City is the center of the universe and beyond. That's what New Yorkers keep telling us, anyway. They have the best this and the best that, and don't you dare suggest you can get better (fill in the blank) somewhere else. "Everyone knows New York City is home to the world's best bagels,'' TimeOut magazine recently proclaimed. Because? Because they say so, that's why!  

New Yorkers, bless their conceited, self-centered hearts, are actually clueless about many things. We could start with "humility,'' but that would be too obvious. Here are 12 things they really are clueless about. We're talking just New York City residents here; Upstate has its head screwed on straight.   

5 tdbuff00 ARISTIDE
Aristide Economopoulos I The Star-Ledger
Hot dogs

Wait, you say, what about all those hot dog carts around New York City? They're carts serving the same "dirty water'' hot dogs they've been serving for generations. "Millions of carts selling the same lukewarm dogs,'' says hot dog expert John Fox. Good luck getting a chili dog, or an Italian hot dog. Yes, Nathan's, which opened on Coney Island in 1916, is a hot dog icon. And that's about it, New York, when it comes to hot dogs. Come over to the Jersey side, merely the center of the hot dog universe. 

1 circle MURRAY
Ed Murray I The Star-Ledger
Traffic circles

This may be one category New Yorkers are proud they're clueless about. Proof that New Jerseyans are superior drivers: Our talent mastering the motoring mayhem that is the typical NJ circle. Best tip: When you're approaching the circle, don't stop (unless there's a stop sign, of course). Yield when necessary. Otherwise, get your butt in there. 

Oh, and I love circles. I hold the world's record for most continuous times around a circle without stopping (55, Somerville Circle, 2008). Here's the white-knuckle account about my whirlwind adventure. 

Peter Genovese | NJ Advance Media for NJ.com

Please don't get me started on this. New Jersey is the diner capital of the world, with about 600 diners. We know what diners look like, right? New Yorkers, on the other hand, apparently can't tell the difference between a diner, coffee shop and luncheonette. Crain's New York Business and The New York Times are among those who lump all three together. "Another New York diner turns off the grill'' was the headline on The Times' story on the demise of the Cup and Saucer, which most assuredly was not a diner. Repeat after me, New Yorkers: Coffee shops are not diners. Luncheonettes are not diners. Ask any New Jerseyan; they'll set you straight. What does a diner look like? See the photo. 

Memorial Day weekend at the Jersey Shore
Andy Mills I The Star-Ledger

There are the Coney Island and Rockaway Beach boardwalks, and that's about it. New Yorkers, take it as a random act of kindness that we didn't mention your beaches (the lack thereof is why so many of you pack our beaches every summer). Here's the last word on NYC boardwalks: 9 of the 14 Best Boardwalks In and Around New York City are in Jersey (only three are in NYC). Hahaha.   



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